quick guide: masturbation
grab your meat while I ride the beat
I talk about incessantly about masturbation. Like, all the time. Why? Because in my oh-so-humble opinion, a healthy masturbation practice can have significant positive effects on the fulfillment and satisfaction of one's sex life. Why is that?
- Because it feels damn good. like...RIGHT?!?! There is this crazy inherent assumption out there that we need someone else around in order for us to have sex. In order for us to reach orgasm. In order for us to feel sexually fulfilled. And that is just straight bullshit. I want to empower you to take your sexual pleasure into your own hands (or vibrators, dildos, showerheads, whatever....). Feel confident knowing that you don't NEED anyone else in order to be orgasmically satisfied. There is a refreshing joy in knowing that a partner might be a great sexual bonus, but is not a prerequisite.
- Knowing what makes you feel good (what kind of stroke, speed, pressure, technique, etc.) gives you the ability to communicate to partners what they can do to provide you with pleasure. It gives us the ability to answer honestly and accurately when a lover asks us what we want, and then also gives our partners increased capability in satisfying our needs.
And btw, there are lots of different ways to explore masturbation, so don't be shy! Some ideas include:
- Doing what I like to call "the old faithful" - that quick and dirty technique that we KNOW will bring us an efficient and dependable O.
- Make love to yourself - rather than ALWAYS using the old faithful technique when you're tickling your pickle, seduce yourself. Take your time. Tease your naughty bits. See how close you can get before reaching your climax and then working your way back up. Set the mood. get indulgently comfortable. Treat yourself as good as you'd treat your beloved. Really spoil yourself and savor the experience, instead of treating it like consolation sex.
- Try something totally new! Maybe something you've been wondering about but too shy to try with a partner (maybe squirting or some anal play). Watch masturbation porn for some inspiration - maybe something you never tried before could feel better than your tried and true routine? If you're not typically a toy user, you could give one a whirl. or, if you always depend on one for solo sex, encourage your hand to do some work. You could end up finding your new fave pleasure technique!